My friend Cosmo Landesman and I recently thought of an idea for a toilet book over lunch. Called ‘You Know You’re Getting Old When…’, it would be a compendium of all those moments when you suddenly get a whiff of mortality. By the end of the meal, the table was littered with paper napkins, all covered in our spidery scrawl.
For instance, under the heading ‘Men and their bodies’, we came up with the following: “You know you’re getting old when… you let out an involuntary fart when you bend over.”
Not funny? Okay, try this. Under ‘Around The House’: “You know you’re getting old when… you’re yelling at the radio. But the radio isn’t on.”
Okay, okay. Last one, I promise. Under ‘Language’: “You know you’re getting old when… you say ‘wicked’ or ‘awesome’ instead of ‘Thank you’.” (To read more, click here.)